guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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