so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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