when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
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