Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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