just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
