he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
