there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I just gift wrapped bread.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
