the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
