Midget sex pt 2 tonight
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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