i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I'm both gender and math confused
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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