do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize