you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
