surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
