Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Randomize
