Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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