So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
