Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
