no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize