God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
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