i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
