When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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