I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
