How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
