peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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