Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
