Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
