I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
