that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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