he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
