we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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