I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
