I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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