i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
