Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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