if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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