Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Randomize
