You really coming over, don't trick.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Randomize
