I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
