Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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