It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
