made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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