just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
