i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I will be naked everywhere
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize