I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize