Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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