Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
