I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
