Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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