In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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