Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
